The Hater’s Guide to Holiday Greetings
I used Adobe Firefly to generate this and I feel dirty about it but at least I wrote a good prompt and got it right on the first try.
Every year.
Every year I swear I’m going to send holiday cards to my loved ones. Particularly 2007, the year I eloped. There are things to announce! Then 2009, the year I bought a house. I’m a big boy now! I have a permanent address! I have created a family structure!
Or 2010, the year I turned 30! Or 2015, the year I turned 35! I used to say the same thing about buying a Big Boy Cello to replace (or supplement) my trusty student model, i.e. the only cello I have ever owned, purchased for myself in 2003. Side note, I am REALLY feeling masculine today, I guess.
Or 2018, the year I moved to Richmond! Or 2019. 2020, 2021… well, no, I was excused because I was going through a second adolescence and getting resettled, or so I thought.
Is this just, like, a neurodivergence thing? I can’t even be bothered to send cards to my immediate family for birthdays and holidays. So a gigantor undertaking like reaching out and asking who wants a card, or choosing my 20 to 200 closest friends and family as though I were putting together an invite to a party is either going to be something I absolutely cannot do or will dive headfirst into and be unable to do anything else.
Don’t get me wrong. I LOVE RECEIVING YOUR HOLIDAY GREETINGS. I don’t care whether they’re pre-printed postcards with nice photos, storebought cards with a message or simply your signature, lovely handmade things, anything at all. I just can’t figure out how to do anything in addition to all the dumb things I already spend my time doing. Seriously, every time someone exclaims “YOU’RE SO BUSY” I want to respond “Thanks! I have to be this busy because when I’m not, I’m too depressed to get out of bed!”
Anyway, enough ranting. Now it’s time to keep reading to see if you’re on my list as I recount the joys of what I did in 2025 based on my Google Calendar (seriously, there is no other way to remember). It’s gonna be like one of those things you get from someone you barely know but they’ve put together an entire spiral bound tome with excruciating details about what everyone in their family has been up to. Only MINE IS ALL ABOUT ME. (And YOU? Again, read on.)
Note: it won’t let me upload audio for any other sections, so this is all you get.
JANUARY 2025: THE MONTH I SPENT $10,000 to CUT OFF MY CAT’S PENIS
I don’t really want to relive this one, but at least finishing up the run of “The Hunchback of Notre Dame” at Workhouse was a welcome distraction. I got to work with Paige Rammelkamp again (my favorite, the G.O.A.T.) and met Garrett Jones, Cindy Ross, Steve McBride, and several other wonderful musicians, many of whom I’ve performed with throughout the year, and Garrett and Steve are giving Paige a run for her money because they keep throwing gigs at me. Thank you. I love you all.
I also got to celebrate Ashley Reinhart’s birthday with some of her other lovely friends in the bucolic Virginia countryside, with fun wine drinking times at the Winery at La Grange (the best closest-in winery in Virginia if you’re not looking to go farther afield than Haymarket and don’t care that they ship in a lot of their grapes). We even got snow. And a horse tried to eat my hand. The bruise on my finger went away after a few weeks.
Finally, I started a band with “Professional” Phil Mayer and we rehearsed once to play our first gig as Double Yes two weeks later at Eckington Hall. We just made stuff up and we’ve done it a few times since in the main hall at Union Station. Thanks to David Ross (no relation to Cindy) for always having faith in my projects, and thanks to Phil for continuing to throw Temple Micah and other gigs at me.
February 2025: My First Improv Comedy Performance; also my first time buying something at the Scottish store in Williamsburg Va.
I can already tell I’m going to get tired of writing even 2-3 paragraphs per month. Maybe “tired” isn’t the right word. Maybe it’s “my eyes really hate focusing on this laptop screen while I’m wearing my glasses.”
Longtime friend and supporter of my musical and personal endeavors Theresa Marier Weiler announced that she was driving down from Michigan to our alma mater, William & Mary, to perform with her comedy troupe at an improv festival. This was an easy decision for me - Drive 2.5 hours and stay at a cute B&B with one of my o.g. bitches? Absolutely. I attended some of the performances, walked around campus and CW nostalgically, shopped with money I didn’t have (what else is new), found out there’s finally good coffee in town (sorry Aromas, you belong in a strip mall at best), and then at the end of the festival they invited everyone onstage to do a big weird collective tag-in sort of situation. I definitely made a lot of inappropriate jokes about sexy children. Hopefully I’m now on some kind of list, if I wasn’t already. But the best part was simply sitting on the floor of one of our (adjoining! cute!) rooms eating Wawa hoagies (again, did not exist when we went to school there, sigh) and being silly. Well, half-silly, half-profound, which is exactly the way we like it.
Next, I played cello for H-B Woodlawn’s production of “Into the Woods.” Thanks as always to Bill Podolski for inviting me. Can’t wait to play with you again in February 2026! And then I got to sub on bass guitar for “The Last Five Years,” which I had played previously on cello. Thanks to Garrett again for that one.
Friends also let me do fun things like professional organizing and dogsitting this month. Reminder that these services are always available to you.
And I spent a lot of time with bestie Lynette Raudner and her talented husband Sean Tracy. Love you two. Let’s do it again next year.
March 2025: A Handful of Weird Gigs and Hangs with Girls
I really can’t come up with snappy titles for each month. Not that I already had. Nothing was going to beat January.
I started the month with a last-minute bass sub gig for Chris Mendelis’s Tom Petty and Fleetwood Mac cover band. This led to me being invited to play in another cover band that some dudes in the audience were in, and that was fun for a minute before I got too busy for it. I’m happy to have met some good people, though, the best and most talented of which is the inimitable Olivia Blashford. Thanks also to band practice hosts Paul and Lois McGehee for delicious food and booze.
Hangs with friends were had, thank god, though I don’t know how I had the time with it. I actually managed to have dinner with the true o.g. bestie Alison Greenwald Martin, and I took Melissa Ngo and Sonja Hubbard to La Grange, where we brought a nylon string guitar and occupied the entire upstairs space with our nonsense.
The well-named and hastily-assembled Schmidt’s Creek also continued to play at the Evening Star open mic after coming together for the first time for a holiday gig the previous December. Theresa Schmidt, Vicki Wenderlich, Pete Halverson, and Phil Raino, thanks for being constant buds and bringers of joy.
Czars of Leisure had a gig at Galaxy Hut. Greg Roth, Todd Pozen, Jeff Miller - again, y’all are amongst the most o.g. of the bunch. Let’s make sure to reschedule our dinner at my fiancé restaurant soon.
And then I had a St. Paddy’s gig with The Proper Snoggers in Ocean City - Kevin Adkins and Erik Estenson, you are simply delightful. They liked us so much, we came back and did it again in August.
April 2025: Wow, what a surprise, more gigs and hangs
Played a great gig with the also inimitable Sarah Wilcox (how the hell do I know so many talented and amazing people?) at the top of the month, then went to Harrisonburg to play her sister’s wedding a few weeks later.
The lovely Marieke + Marshall Bland had an awesome baby shower. I spent most of my time hiding in the corner with my new friends Samiksha and Hong-Ah.
Did my usual Easter cello performances at Our Lady of Mercy in Potomac. Currently gearing up to do the Xmas gigs. Thanks to Amy Domingues for getting me that gig a few years back.
Short Lives started playing again for the first time in seven years. Oh, Erik Bradford. Again one of the most o.g… I WISH I COULD QUIT YOU (not really).
Am I getting tired of writing or was this month just a little more simple than the others?
May 2025: My day job cut my hours in half and I had yet another midlife crisis, and also I bought my mom a condo
Are these things all related? Likely.
We kicked the month off with a lovely cocktail party at Rebecca Zwisler’s home. Got to catch up with Catherine Moran a bit before Irish exiting (my favorite).
The following day, I played cello at a huge gala at the Four Seasons in Georgetown. Lots of fancy clothes were sported this weekend, I tell ya. Thanks again to previously mentioned Professional Phil but also to Healy Slakman, the absolute greatest human of all time.
Then my work’s contracts got DOGEd. In the wake of this, I met up with Christiann MacAuley, Zach King, and Lauren Hong to go to Taco Bell Cantina for the first time. You bet your ass I drank at lunch.
We’re not even done with the first week of May yet, folks. I played a swanky (wow, more dress-up?) trio gig at a ridiculous house in McLean. Thanks to Ken Avis for that one, and we actually met in person this time! Andrew Crane (speaking of o.g.s) and new violinist friend Sonya Hayes are the best to play with, btw.
Oh and THEN I played solo cello for a couple hours that Saturday and Sunday on the sidewalk outside an art and antiques store in Old Town. There is such a story here; if you know, you know. I got paid in two pieces of art valued at a total of $650.
I played bass guitar for “Man of La Mancha” (thanks to previously mentioned Steve) and Czars had another show. In the middle of that week, I closed on a condo I bought for Linda Delap (with a lot of help and support from one Christie L. Rears).
And now we’re halfway through the month. Thankfully things slowed down a bit in the latter half. I did some cello studio work and Schmidt’s Creek played another gig. I ran an untrained half marathon with Jennifer Mills. We immediately signed up to do it again. I ran off to play a wedding gig in Frederick with new violinist friend Sarah Larsen. And then the month ended.
June 2025: The one where my friends stood up on a chair and gave a series of speeches in my honor
Man. This month. It begins with “Czars practice I forgot about.” Telling.
Josh Pittman (who had been present so far in 2025, sort of, and by “sort of” I mean we were ships passing in the night, one of many reasons we called it quits this month) and I headed up to Boston for a celebration of life for the mother of his wonderful cruise ship bandmate Arjana Danylets (+Ivan). They threw a hell of a party. It was socially and emotionally overwhelming, but lovely. I hadn’t walked around Boston in such a long time, and I missed it. Josh + I had an amazing meal at Ma Maison, where I realized a lot of things, one being that I had to get a tattoo of the restaurant logo.
Dammit
The logo is white
The following weekend, Christie and our dad Himself came to town. That Saturday, on Flag Day, here’s what I did.
Played cello in the morning at Temple Micah
Played cello in the afternoon with new friend Sam D’Agostino at a house show
Got a flash tattoo at said house show (sardines)
In the 20 minutes I had free between the show and dinner, split up with my boyfriend of nearly five years
Went to dinner with my dad and sister at Matt & Tony’s, which wins the award for favorite Alexandria spot of 2025
Ran into Theresa Schmidt and her husband Josh Adams at said dinner
Probably watched a movie when we got home
The weekend after THAT, Czars played at Port City on Friday night, then I drove out with Lynette and Sean to hang at a winery and see Sean perform for a summer solstice party thing. It was just what I needed, maybe minus the mosquito bites.
And the following week: My 45th birthday. I put together a hasty party invite at the new location of Green Pig Bistro, where I had just had lunch with Zach and Christiann (and Hunter Bowen? maybe?) the week prior. The party was a smashing success. Mej Spillane got up on a chair and gave a speech that started something like “I used to hate Kate.” Real strong intro, intrigued to hear more. Then she absolutely gushed about me. A few more friends got up and did the same. What did I do to deserve you people? We afterpartied at Galaxy Hut, of course.
To round out the month, another friend trusted me to help them with home organization, and I’m glad she did. Reconnecting with Sophia Wiedeman has been a delight.
July 2025: Got Another tattoo and met someone I already knew
A month after having the idea and less than a month after the house party sardines, the snail from Ma Maison was memorialized on my arm.
As for the someone, he’s an introvert and a Communist, so I won’t embarrass him or be too individualistic by talking about how special he is.
Other than that, things really slowed down, thank god. It was nice to be able to go SEE shows for once, at Galactic Panther and Fort Reno. It was nice to go have fancy cocktails and dinner with Jennifer Herrera. And it was EXTRA nice to be able to drop everything and drive down to Myrtle Beach (where I had never been!) to hang with Karen Wood, her now-fiancé Connor Els, and her family.
But then they picked up again, and I started playing in the pit for Little Theatre of Alexandria’s production of “Kinky Boots.” Because of course I did.
August 2025: More music and another unprepared half marathon
Kinky + Broadway Summer (thanks again Steve) makes for one busy Kate! And then at the end of the month I flew to Maine with Dr. Jenn again and ran yet another half marathon with no preparation.
Yeah, now I’m getting tired of writing. Oh, I did start working at Foxes Music for some reason. Dave Belazis said they would need help for the busy rental season. So of course I overcommitted myself.
And I fed more people’s cats and watched their dogs, because why not?
September 2025: I presciently decide to sling wine again and sign up for way too much freelance work
I had joked with my former Linden Vineyards colleagues that I should come back and work there again, and then they were like “but what if not joke?” so… yeah. I did that. A lot this month and the following.
Also on the “yeah, I did that” list? Driving down to Atlanta for a quick overnight to see Nine Inch Nails with Christie. In my, uh, new (used) car that I bought Labor Day weekend (just like when I bought my VW in 2020 to deal with trauma), because I had to sell my old car for a massive profit and take out a new car loan to have enough money to survive.
Double Yes had another Union Station gig, this time joined by an amazing guitarist named Amit Peled. And another Sarah Wilcox gig in Harrisonburg. There’s an AirBNB I love there so much that I had stayed there back in April, again this time, and then a week or two later with sl8 for some Basic Bitch Fall Fun (TM).
And of course all of the Temple Micah gigs for Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur to round out the month.
October 2025: I made $0 at my day job, but I continued slinging wine, started hustling my ass off for music gigs, and my sister moved back to town
And perhaps even more importantly, Jeff introduces me to Ann Lewis, and I immediately ask WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN HIDING HER? The cat mom, keyboardist extraordinaire, and powerful-ass tech bitch I have needed in my life (and bands) so badly.
I did a bunch of cello subs with Paige and Garrett at Creative Cauldron in Falls Church.
And I had some freelance stuff to work on in the tech + comms space, but I also sort of enjoyed a little bit of breathing room. But I was still working at the winery a bunch, so, did I really?
November 2025: Is it Thanksgiving yet?
Well, we started this month with the THIRD AND FINAL OF 2025 ill-advised unprepared half marathon with Dr. Jenn, and we loved it even more than the others, although we failed to sign up for our next race, which will turn out to be a good thing given the fact that I will injure myself at the end of this month.
I did a cello sub gig for “Hadestown: Teen Edition” with Michael Barranco, then moved into full Paige territory with a sunny little production about the 1995 assassination of Israeli Prime Minister, “November 4,” which … started on November 4 and went until like December 7. It was a lot! And I still worked at the winery a little! And I had Thanksgiving with winery people, and it was wondrous. UNTIL…
December 2025: Ending it all with a serious back injury
Don’t get old, I keep telling people. The Saturday after Thanksgiving, I helped a friend move a free couch that had to be taken that morning, and I was still recovering from a respiratory infection. I was weak. I lifted improperly. I felt myself hurting my back while I was doing it. And then once the respiratory stuff started resolving a few days later… WOW, LOWER BACK PAIN. And then two weeks later, back pain almost completely disappears, to be replaced with LEFT LEG PAIN AND NUMBNESS. Hello, sciatica! Now instead of running with Dr. Jenn I’m getting lots of prescriptions from her.
And here we are, and it’s Xmas and whatnot, and I’ve started playing in the pit again for the next Workhouse show, which is “Into the Woods” (twice in one year now!), and we are doing it all over again. But at least I had time to throw a very poorly planned holiday party that I intended to be very small and ended up being HYOOGE.
So what’s the moral of the story here? I think writing this all out has taught me that I don’t spend time on things; I spend time with people. And I do it because I need to. I need you all. I love you all.
P.S. Fuck fascism.
